Time Off
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
So the week-long vacay was a blast, but as always, I am more than glad to be home. Here's the recap: (click to enlarge pictures, or view Flickr set on sidebar)

Friday - Wait 7 hours at O'Hare for delayed flight to Atlanta (thank you, nationwide storm system). During wait, endure inappropriate comments about my hair - ALL MY HAIR - from a portly gentleman with a limp. Decide not to read him the riot act, as he is clearly disabled, thereby activating my midwestern guilt. Instead move lamely (ba duh dum) to the other side of the terminal and act busy while waiting for boarding group to be called.

Saturday - Arrive in Atlanta at almost 2 a.m. Meet up with a very sleepy Sean in baggage claim. Sleep. Wake up, drive to house in East Tennessee. Question personal safety during 1/2-hour drive from main road to rental house - a drive that included many houses that should be (if they are not already) condemned for public health reasons. Decide that should I decide to try crystal meth on vacation, I would be all set. At least one of those homes HAD to have a meth lab inside, and perhaps even that abandoned, black schoolbus with the tinted windows.

Sunday - Grocery shopping, trip to the Dollar General for very important things like pool noodles, $1.50 floatie toys, and swirly wind wands that will probably be left behind upon departure from the house. Dinner at mediocre resort restaurant, and upon seeing the MILLIONTH pair of bermuda shorts, wonder if I haven't stepped into a time machine and am now inside the production of Dirty Dancing. Only there isn't a talent show, and this cleary ain't the Catskills.

Monday - Spend day aboard rented pontoon boat. Learn that pontoon boats can actually pick up some serious speed, especially when you're clinging for your life behind one in a rented tube with broken handles. Klassy with a K. Who knew the lake would be so warm? Pee in aforementioned lake. Twice. Midwestern guilt sets in and I feel obliged to loudly announce that I'm peeing so that no one (including my 4-year old niece) comes near me.

Tuesday - Wake up and realize that nearly every chest and upper arm muscle is now strained, thanks to fabulously fun (and semi-drunk) tubing on previous day. Medicate with some hot tub time, and some beers. Niiiiice. Decide to attend a 5 Division Championship Race at the local speedway / dirt track - after a solid hour of shaking in her tear-filled boots, my niece informs me that her favorite one is the pink and purple one. Huge surprise there. Awesome time, and as with almost all races, excellent people watching. (and yummy sno-cones)

Wednesday - Somewhere in the middle of the week, I golfed roughly 9 of 18 holes. I am not a terrible golfer, but I am also not a good golfer. I forget how boring it is, even when you're playing it! I'll never understand that, by the way...how can it possibly be so damned boring? Also, how can it involve a surprising level of physical activity? Maybe when one actually knows HOW to golf properly, one does not spend half the time searching high grasses, and climbing up and down steep hillsides, looking for her G**AMNED MAXFLI 4 ALREADY. Good Lord.

Thursday - Another blank day. This, my friends is the downside of deciding NOT to bring your planner on vacation. It's nice and stress-free, but also makes for poor blogging. I believe this was the day that Sean and I decided to abandon the group and see Ratatouille at the local movie theatre. $2 for 2 people. Yes. $2. The friday night combo, I noted, was $10.25 for 2 adult entrance tickets, 2 large drinks, and 1 large popcorn. Then again, taking advantage of this deal on a regular basis would include moving to LaFollette, TN. Which I will not be doing anytime soon.

Friday - Wrap-up day. Time to cook up all the leftovers, pig out, and do laundry. The nice thing about renting a house (thanks Dick and Sally!) is that I get to arrive at home with clean clothes. Gotta love it. Poker night - betting with loose change. We're Rockefellers, I tell ya. Lose all money (as usual, given the quality of my poker skills), and end up taking self to bed.

Saturday - Up early to make sausage & cream cheese poppers for breakfast. Pack up, head out. Drive back to Atlanta, find my favorite hair product EVER that the Chicagoland ULTA stores no longer carry. Purchase two, make mental note to have Sean buy more when I run out. Admit that while ULTA shopping excursions may be slightly emasculating, but it's not like I'm sending him out for tampons, GEEZ.

Taken on Saturday morning, during a quiet moment just after the sun came up.

Sunday - Up before dawn to catch punctual flight (thank you, airline Gods). Home by 9am to pick up car, dog, and unwind.

What is it about vacations that makes me tired? PHEW!