I Kan Has Wahrrm Wether Plz?
Monday, March 31, 2008
Here in Chicago, we have entered a very magical time of year. Most people call in Spring, but we know better. We don't really get a spring season. Winter usually sticks around in some gloomy, half-assed form or fashion until one day *BAM* it's 95 degrees in the shade and we're all dying, wondering whether we'll live through to see the end of August.

The gloom, according to Weather.Com, is here to stay this week. Unfortunately, so are the chillier temperatures. A high of sixty is nice, but since that will be happening while I sit inside an office, I don't really give it much merit. So when you think about it, we are really just stuck in a prolonged, wet winter state that makes me want to gouge out my eyeballs with grapefruit spoons. This morning, it wasn't raining but it wasn't dry out either. It was both, and it was IRRITATING. Kind of like being hit in the face intermittently by really cold sneeze clouds. Only without all the germs and the sneeze smell (you KNOW what I'm talking about). Ahem.

Do you think if I put all my winter clothes away for the season, and started putting my summer clothing into my drawers and closets, that it would make a difference? What if the Universe is waiting for me to shave my legs and put on a pair of bermuda shorts? DO YOU HEAR ME UNIVERSE? DO I NEED TO SHAVE MY LEGS? IS THAT WHAT IT'S GOING TO TAKE?! DON'T MAKE ME TURN THIS CAR AROUND.