Hot Mess: A Working List
(Alternate Title: At Least my Closets are Clean)

Tuesday, January 06, 2009
Current Contents of my Dining Room Table
2 white bath rugs, nubby
2 white bath towels, clean
2 white picture frames
1 slate, 12X12" floor tile
1 birthday gift, wrapped
2 white hand towels, new
4,598 smudges (never get a glass top table)

Current Contents of my TV/Coffee Table
4 novels, one of which is almost finished
3 back issues of Time
1 Air Team Emissions Test mailing
2 random coffee table books
1 KitchenAid Food Processor Manual
5 old copies of Discover Magazine
2 hair clips, claw style
1 issue of Inc. Magazine
8 issues of Popular Mechanics
2 issues of Chicago Magazine
1 copy of this month's Midwest Living magazine
1 copy of December's In Style
1 box of matches from the dollar store
1 Philosophy candle
1 catalog of beautiful things
45 pieces of errant dog hair

Current Contents of my Kitchen Counters
1 coffeemaker
1 jar of dog treats
1 bottle of ibuprofen
1 set of salt/pepper
1 George Foreman grill
300 grease splatters from last weekend's cooking binge
1 food processor
3 cookbooks, raggedy
1 cutting board
1 utensil jar, stuffed to the gills
1 paper towel dispenser
1 blue sponge
1 plastic cup
1 jar of Flintstones jelly vitamins
1 bottle of Brewer's Yeast Canine Supplements
2 forks, used and dirty

Current Contents of My Brain
...umm, what? huh?