Oh Boy. Literally. Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Can we all please just leave the poor boy alone to be a kid?!

 

How can you say someone is the best at something, when the rankings and metrics have never been applied below a certain age? Thank God his parents sound logical and grounded - this world is all too eager to grind child prodigies into the dust, once they have acquired their fifteen minutes of fame. And don't even get me started on my feelings about unethical recruiting in college sports. You don't want me to go there.

Bless his 10-year old heart.

Where's The Love? Friday, March 26, 2010

I feel like I've been seeing these around a LOT lately. I thought it might be hilarious to wear them to an upcoming mustache party (like a mustache for your forehead! no? so that's not going to fly, then? oh well), so I went online to see how much they cost. But there's no red bangs! NO RED BANGS, PEOPLE. What gives, Jessica?

Hrmph.

Zoot Suits

Imagine my surprise this morning when I pop into my site stats page and notice a 5934820439% increase in traffic. (whatever, IT IS TOO a real measurement. heh) As it turns out, the fabulous Miss Zoot had put up a a great post and linked to this here little online journal. Welcome, Zoot readers! There are no cute babies here, but I can serve up a healthy dose of sarcasm, a splash of unsolicited judgment against celebrities in the news, and travel photos. So glad to have you! Thanks again, Zoot.

In turn, I am recommending a couple sites from my reader with which some of you might not be as familiar -

All Up in the Kool Aid has become a fast friend of mine online - for cute kiddos, news from South Korea, and vegetarian information galore.

Fam2Teachers is my sister's blog - she is pretty busy and doesn't always update, but you can rely on her for hilarious stories of the bizarre words that come of my niece and nephew's mouths.

Dysfunction Junction is a must-read. Nuff said.

Happy Friday, everyone!

Oh Mah Gah. Wednesday, March 24, 2010

I don't have the time or energy to list all the things that are heinously wrong about this.

Picture credit: yours truly, shot in bewilderment while hanging backwards out of the passenger side window of our rented Prius as we drove out of downtown Scottsdale.

List: Things That Are/Things I Cannot Explain About Myself Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Alternate Ranty Title: ONE CUP OF YOGURT DOES NOT A LUNCH MAKE

1. I dislike the croutons at Corner Bakery - way too crunchy. They hurt my mouth!

2. I find myself wearing this one bra repeatedly. I own more than one, yet somehow end up in the same one nearly every day (don't gag - I do launder it, duh). It's becoming seriously boring. Is this laziness? My love for routines played out in my choice of undergarments? Comfort? The world may never know.

3. Woman who see dieting as a given/obligation bother me. I want to enjoy my food, not be shamed into some tasteless Lean Cuisine just because all the women around me think it's what should be done. I'm tired of people looking at what I'm eating, then saying things like "Oh, wow, what a treat!" like my salad with beans in a massive piece of chocolate cake or something. DON'T PUT YOUR FOOD GUILT ON ME, LADY. My confusion on this issue consumes me (pun and hyperbole very much intended).

4. Now that I am living in a location with a yard, I have become obsessed with the idea of gardening this summer/fall. Suggestions?

5. Tuesdays are never as good as one wants them to be.

A Quiet Mind Thursday, March 18, 2010

To know me is to recognize my endearing quirks, but to love me? Well, that requires a more developed skill set. I don't quiet down well - my mind is always racing. I thought our impromptu trip to Arizona might just be the golden ticket - the thing to bring me down off the carousel of my busy life.

I was right. (big deep breath)

I can see why people retire here. On the way into Scottsdale from the airport, I was looking out the window when I noticed that every car looked shiny and new. That is when I realized they weren't, in fact, all new - they were just clean. CLEAN. It's been so many months of winter in Chicago that I completely forgotten what a clean, shiny car looked like. We'll call it a seasonal coping mechanism.

Earlier today, I spent the morning doing triage on my work email and then took the operation outside, into the daylight. While I surfed the internet aimlessly, I enjoyed the sights and sounds so long past for us Chicagoans: birds chirping, gentle breezes rustling rough palm branches, the quiet, unmistakable slapping of flip-flops on pavers, in short? Heaven. I am so, so grateful for this opportunity to get away - mentally and physically.

Today is a really good day.

Watch Out Scottsdale, Here Come Jamie's Wintry White Legs! Tuesday, March 16, 2010

photo credit: Wikimedia

Sean and I leave tomorrow for Arizona - to attend a function related to the jeeb (his, not mine). He's getting an award (well-deserved) and part of the prize is a trip to a resort in Scottsdale. This means, of course, that I have spent the better part of the past 4 days trying desperately to figure out what in the SAM HELL I am supposed to wear.

What is "resort casual" anyway? My favorite color is grey, people. I don't own sundresses in bright, floral prints. The obvious solution is to just pack everything that fits, which is exactly what I plan on doing. (points to self) This little piggy's luggage will go schlep schlep schlep all the way to Phoenix.

We are making the trip into a long weekend, and have some great stuff planned - dinners, outings, tours, etc. I'm still open to suggestions, though, and would love your thoughts! Bring on the ideas!

Little Known Fact About Me: Monday, March 15, 2010

If I pass roadkill while driving, I close my eyes *very very briefly* and say a little prayer for the animal that once was.

Yesterday I saw a small deer lying peacefully near a ditch in my neighborhood - it could have easily been one of the resident grouping I see each morning on my way to the train, munching and wandering. It could be the one that eats my parents' landscaping each spring. It was lovely in its sleep, legs crossed daintily, it's eyes closed in peace. I slowed down so I could discern whether it might have still be breathing, but didn't see any signs of life. I fully understand the whole "circle of life" thing, but that doesn't make it a happy event. Sigh.

I Really Needed This Today Friday, March 12, 2010

(deep breath)

If you don't want to, you don't have to:
* aim for the corner office
* ever own a car again
* apologize for putting yourself first
* shave your legs
* care about American Idol/Grey's Anatomy/Lost
* feel guilty for caring about American Idol/Grey's Anatomy/Lost
* go to the bridal shower of that co-worker you don't really know
* get married
* have kids
* do anything other than be a fantastic wife and mother
* go out on Saturday night
* invest in real estate
* cook
* feel guilty about sleeping late
* go to grad school
* find your dream job immediately following college
* go to college
* tie your ego up in your possessions
* feel like to you need to make excuses for living a life that works for you

Thank you, Sarah, for the reminder.

What Could Have Been Thursday, March 11, 2010

No way! So interesting.

Wet-nesday Wednesday, March 10, 2010

It's raining here, and could get above 50 degrees today (!), so OF COURSE my hair looks something like this:


Truly spectacular. And by "spectacular," I of course mean "pretty darn horrendous." PONYTAIL IT IS. You win, Spring.


Photo Credit: The B.S. Report

Reading: HAAAAAAAAA Edition Tuesday, March 09, 2010

And his mother took her cane and blocked me. So I couldn't get up there very fast.

Thank you, Salon.Com, for answering my most burning question from last night's duller-than-a-box-of-cotton-balls Oscars broadcast.

Photo credit: Salon.com

Reading Monday, March 08, 2010

My wife tells me I overthink. I don't think it's possible to do that, but I do admit that my tendency has always been to go first to the dark interpretation. Sometimes I attribute this to my mother's influence, despite her avowals to the opposite - for doesn't insistent optimism imply what one is all the time combating? My father, on the other hand, was inclined by nature to see the world as benevolent, which is why a good-humored pessimism was the mark of his bearing in the world. I guess, when it comes down to it, that I ended up more like my mother. I was wrong about the bathrobe, as it turns out. But I don't think I'm wrong about the other things.

Where in the Pacific Northwest am I? Saturday, March 06, 2010

First one to guess correctly gets a prize!

Symmetry Friday, March 05, 2010

Dick Cheney is doing well, post-operation. Thanks for the emails and positive thinking, everybody. Sorry this update took me so long! My sister is also doing well, and I think might even be back at work (Joey, where are you, anyhow?) today.

Blessings all around.

Dem Bones Tuesday, March 02, 2010

I know I've been truly lousy about updating this here little blog lately, but with good reason: I'm BUSY, yo. So you'll have to forgive me for requesting a small favor from you, loyal reader.

My dad (known to most on this blog as "Dick Cheney") is undergoing his second total hip replacement surgery tomorrow afternoon. His other/previous procedure went as smoothly as can be expected, so I realize I shouldn't be worried. (And there's definitely a post in my brain somewhere about my sister's gallbladder removal procedure, done on Monday in roughly 25 minutes - that's less time and fanfare than my last trip through the Taco Bell drive-thru. Seriously! Lasers!!! Ah well, another story for another time...)

There is something about major surgery that brings an unpleasant tinge of mortality to the table - like when the hair stands up on the back of your neck - you're not injured, but it's not exactly a pleasant feeling. I'm calm, but I'm worried. It's a cautious, leery confidence.

So if you are at all spiritually inclined, please send your prayers/vibes/whathaveyous in the general direction of NW Memorial's orthopedic wing around 1:30 pm. My pops could use all the positive energy he can get. Thanks.